Speedstar* – Unbreakable

 

All I Ever Wanted Was Ziggy-Zig-Ah

(Spice Girls Announce Reunion – LATimes.com)

As if their “legacy” wasn’t enough, as if Spiceworld was not good enough for them the Spice Girls are back to haunt us again with pure pop craptacularness. If you don’t remember the Spice Girls, feel lucky – feel very lucky. An early nineties phenomena of five English “birds” bouncing in tops to small to music too bubbly. Is the horror coming back yet?

Is the visual reminder helping at all? Just imagine the ginger one’s tits flopping out when she curtsy’s to the Queen. There, classy aren’t they?

In this age of bands reforming – The Police, Duran Duran, Poison, Genesis for one thing only and it’s sure not the music the last thing we need is a reformation of a prefabbed group. Weren’t they crap enough the first time? do we really need to have it all over again? But I bet you that these concerts will sell. People will go and see the Spice Girls. Don’t you get it, if you support terrorism, then it keeps happening! And this is the worst kind of terrorism there is – musical terrorism.

When has a reformation ever actually worked? They get together and then they realise why they broke up in the first place, what a wonderful lesson. Can’t we just all agree to move on? It’s obvious that these groups are greater than the sum of their solo parts but it’s alot easier to ignore the solo artist than it is the “mega band”. It just gets worse when they don’t even realise that their time is up.

Twisted Sister is still playing, but they know it’s a joke. They don’t make a lot of money doing it and they don’t crap on about it either. The most polite thing the Spice Girls could have done, other than not reform at all was to do it quietly and work their way back up.

hahahahaha. Oh, nevermind.

Just Ignore That, It’s Only The Law

Story (LATimes.com)

Isn’t it good to know that when you get subpoenaed you can just stick out your tongue, put your hand, fanned out and go “narnie-narnie-narnie”? So next time you get summoned for say, a federal crime you can just not turn up, tell them that you’re taking your ball and going home?

What do you mean I can’t do that? Surely if one man can do it, so can I? Sure the president’s a powerful man but even he isn’t above the law is he? is he? Oh fuck, he is, isn’t he? He’s already proven that he can twist the truth and he’s already proven that he can never be accountable for anything that goes wrong.

Surely Americans can’t be that blind – let me break it down for you:

John, Paul, George & George

Story (via RS.com)

If ever there was a sign that we need to put this old goat out to pasture, or indeed to the back shed to put a shell in him then surely this is it. Most people know when it’s their time to move on, some hand on a little longer than necessary, but most will shuffle off in due time. Just look at Bob Barker and Tony Blair.

But not King, oh noes, Larry King has interviewed everyone from Julius Caesar to Snoop and I believe he’d probably continue this until he’s interviewing the 2040 olympic team. In one of his more memorable spots King had Yoko Ono, Paul McCartney, Olivia Harrison and Ringo Starr on and between inane questions he referred to the Beatles drummer as “George”

Starr, being Starr was content to let it go, but Paul, being Paul decided to jerk him around a little and I believe for once, I’m with Paul -

KING: Where were you when — when John passed?
MCCARTNEY: When John passed I was in Sussex, at my home in Sussex. That’s where I was.
KING: Did somebody call you?
MCCARTNEY: Yes, my manager at the time called me. And it was just the shock of all shocks, you know?
KING: George, where were you?
MCCARTNEY: George!
KING: Ringo.
MCCARTNEY: No, this is Ringo here.
KING: Ringo, where were you?
STARR: I was in the Bahamas.
KING: I was getting to (INAUDIBLE) George.
STARR: I was…
MCCARTNEY: No, you weren’t, Larry. You said his name wrong.
STARR: Shut up, it’s my turn.
MCCARTNEY: I know, but he got your name wrong, Ringo, on national television.
STARR: I know. Give him a break.
MCCARTNEY: We can’t cut it. It’s live.
STARR: Anyway, I was in the Bahamas and the kids called and they said we’ve heard something, like John has been hurt.

Seriously, inarguably the most famous band ever comprising of four of the most famous men ever and King can’t tell them apart. It’s his JOB to know who’s who. It’s his deal to be on top of things. And this isn’t even RECENT news, this is just merely a milk run.

Despite how much of an arse Paul is, I’d still be enamoured to meet the bloke, I’d even like to meet Ringo if I wasn’t busy that day. Sheesh. It’s time for King to leave. All things must pass, Larry – all things must pass.

Just One More Level

Story (Via smh.com.au)

Resting easy with my DS in one hand and my wireless PS2 controller in the other I read this article today giving all virgins a hope in hell that’s it’s not a lost cause. It turns out that we aren’t totally mentally incapacitated after all and it’s not an illness, it’s merely, uh..an addiction?

No, wait! It’s not an addiction either, it’s merely geeky, though this quote from the article doesn’t sound too positive:

“Working with this problem is no different than working with alcoholic patients. The same denial, the same rationalization, the same inability to give it up,” Dr. Thomas Allen of the Osler Medical Center in Towson, Maryland.”

So I’m an alcoholic now? What if I’m already and alcoholic who happens to like video games too? Crap, now I’m just totally screwed.

Once again a newspaper article makes all gamers out to be total social misfits, like they can’t tell the difference between real life (chicks won’t talk to you) and second life (chicks will talk to you – but they’re really men). Me, I love video games, I love them to pieces there can be few better way to waste an hour (or six) that getting your guy that gold armour on level 47 of the Gorvak Mines.

Sure, I might be a little pale, but the TV gives me a sort-of tan. And sure it annoys my wife no end that I love the Wii more than spending quality time with her. But I’m not addicted. No sir. I mean, I wouldn’t spend so much time on them if they weren’t so loving awesome. As gamers go, I’m pretty lightweight, I can actually stand to tear myself away every now and again to do other things, like you know, work.

What I don’t think that any of these reporters get is that gaming is a whole sub-culture full of it’s own touchstones (memes), heroes (fatal1ty) and villains (3D Studios). It has a community (SL) a meeting grounds (message boards) and a government (Sony/Nintendo/Microsoft). It’s an entire civilization, thanks to Sid Meier. We have tools (gamesharks) and resources (internet) we have currency (l33tness) and language (pwnd!).

Screw it. Let’s be proud of our geekiness and our love of games. Let’s stand up and shout “WE ARE GAMERS!” with pride. We’re not sick, you are. You just don’t get it.

And as soon as I finish this level, I’ll do just that.

Meme Monday: Desu

Popularity: Low

Context: To be used when a thread starts endless repeating itself, or someone posts a picture of something with heterochromatic eyes.

From: Rozen Maiden (Anime) Suiseiseki (Character)

Example:

Definition: “Desu” is a Japanese copula, or to put it in english, a “be verb”. The two main ones used as predicates are “da” and “desu”. Desu is the more polite version. The character Suiseiseki (above) is known for her over frequent use of the copula to an annoying degree.

Spiderbait – Buy Me A Pony

 

Pwndagon

 

Story (Via msnbc)

 

 

Nerds 1 : Government 0. Surely this is just going to prove that the billions upon billion of tax dollars that goes into defense and the military is a a little miss spent? No? Over 1,500 systems were taken off line by “hackers” I put that in inverted commas because, no doubt, being 733t, the call themselves H@X00rZ.

Regardless, I can see nothing but funny in this story, I think that they trying to scare us with the big bad internet bogeyman when really it’s just shown me the complete inefficiency of some of the world’s best paid people. Instead of worrying about security I’m more giggling at the general idiocy shown by the Pentagon.

The poor excuses issued by Gates (no, not that one) and the ridiculous idea that the Pentagon is using outdated systems – what, how is that possible? I thought we gave ALL our money to them so they could stop using Apple IIe’s? Don’t tell me they spend it all on a PS3?

Still, why would anyone pick on the poor defenseless building that’s set up for defending the country? Wait. That came out kind of wrong. How can we put this so the Pentagon looks blameless and not like an over inflated waste of tax dollars that just got totally pwnd?

Oh wait. We can’t.

Now You’re Just Being Glib

 

Story (Via Yahoo!)

 

 

I almost died of shock reading this, no really John Travolta agrees with Tom Cruise on psychiatry? Really? Wow, who would have guessed that, I mean one crazy scientologist agreeing with another? What next? Sam Brownback agreeing with Rev. Jesse Jackson that sex before marriage is evil? whoa, stop me if I’m going to fast here I know there’s a lot to take in.

Sweet marmalade, as soon as Travolta drops off our screens from his almighty comeback he starts bobbing around again, flailing his weird little arms for attention – here we are, almost having forgiven him for Michael and he does something stupid.

What I’d really like to know is if Tom Cruise asked for the back up or he’s sitting in his lounge room, head in hands sighing “oh great, I’ve got a nut case sticking up for me?” Can we expect a slew of scientologist celebrities  to “come out of the spaceship closet” as it were and denounce psychiatry? Jason Lee? Kate Ceberano? Oprah Winfrey? oh…I’ve said too much.

Having crazy people back up your crazy opinions doesn’t make you look less crazy, it makes you look more crazy because you have crazy friends. Duh. Then again, I’m not sure if I know the history of insanity or not.

Mr. Ed’s Getaway Car

 

Story (Via News.Com.Au)

 

 

It looks like the cops have lost their mind again when they start detaining horses over stolen cars. It what can only be described as the caper of the century, the horse was puling a cart that was containing the body of a suspected stolen vehicle.

I love legal terminology, “Well, we don’t know for sure, but this guy’s missing a car that looks a lot like the one they have over there but we can’t be sure. Our eyes aren’t that good anymore” this is where the whole “innocent until proven guilty” takes precedent, you know even if the guy was caught with the knife arse deep in your chest, he’s just a “suspect” or “alleged” murderer. We can all be “alleged” one thing or another. just like our horse friend here is an “alleged thief”

It seems pretty cruel, but in the end they released the horse to animal rights activists, which is good news because they’ll only use the horse to ride naked on and pull carts of weed.
Damn hippies.